Family Dynamics
Several changes can in the dynamics of the relationships we share with our children and parents. Children enter adulthood and may rely on their parents significantly less. On the other hand, your parents may lean on you more than ever before.
Aging Parents
One change that some people in midlife encounter is a shift in their role with their parents. This significant change typically involves becoming a parent's caregiver. Caregiving for aging parents can be a shared responsibility among siblings or with a spouse. (Aneshenshel et al., 1995). Providing care for an aging parent can cause a severe strain on the relationship with the parent as well as hinder a marital relationship. Balancing the needs of an aging parent with other responsibilities in midlife can cause stress and anxiety to all involved. Caring for aging parents while continuing to work a full-time job is referred to as double-and triple-duty caregiving. (Infurna et al., 2020). Individuals who are double-and triple-duty caregivers report having more work-family conflicts, perceived stress, psychological distress, lack of sleep, and poor partner relationship quality. (DePasquale et al., 2016).
Financial strain is a common concern associated with providing care for aging parents. When caregivers take on the responsibility of caring for an aging parent, this generally involves a change in living conditions. This change in living conditions can lead to unexpected additional expenses due to the parents' conditions or the need to pay for an extra family member's daily living expenses. Other financial strains associated with aging parents can include medical bills, depending on insurance coverage. Other options include finding an assisted living facility or nursing home. This option does not come without additional expenses either. Attempting to find a facility that has the appropriate care, location, and cost can be highly stressful.
All these daunting challenges can cause a wide array of emotions, from grief, stress, depression, and anxiety.
These feelings are not uncommon during this difficult time. To help you navigate these emotional challenges, head over to our Health Coping page for services and advice.
Adult Children
As we age and enter middle adulthood, our children are also entering a different stage of life. They enter early adulthood, which can pose several challenges for them and for you, their parent. College costs have been a topic of debate for several years now. More parents than ever before are co-signing for college loans. (Infurna et al., 2020). Some risks include straining other debts, such as retirement savings and mortgage payments, and the liability if your children cannot pay off the loan. (Walsemann & Ailshire, 2017). College not only creates stress and anxiety over costs, but can also create other issues for these new individuals in early adulthood. Several college students encounter problems with maintaining grades, relationship issues, and bouts with depression and stress. Several of these students still rely on their parents for advice and help. Being involved in helping your adult children navigate these obstacles can be daunting in itself, triggering an array of emotions and challenges.
When children grow up and move out of the family home into adulthood, parents experience several emotions, a phenomenon known as "empty nest syndrome." (Cleveland Clinic, 2024). Some of the feelings associated with empty nest syndrome include grief, sadness, stress, loneliness, emptiness, and rejection. (Cleveland Clinic, 2024). This may be one of the reasons why more adult children live with their middle-aged parents compared to 10 years ago. (Fry, 2015).
Becoming a grandparent can be one of the most joyful experiences in life. Being involved in your grandchildren's lives can be very fulfilling. Some grandparents assist with childcare to ease the burden on their children who may be divorced or travel for work, or to help reduce childcare costs. (Infurna et al., 2020). A potential downside to being a grandparent is when it becomes full-time, with the taking on of primary custody of a grandchild. This can lead to stress, psychological, social, and physical issues. (Meyer & Kandic, 2017).
Children entering adulthood may encounter the same obstacles as their parents and every other adult. These challenges include intimate relationships, divorce, raising children, career struggles, and debt, to name a few. As parents, we will experience some of the same emotions as our children when we witness them struggle. It is normal to want to help and guide them in the right direction, but that won't always be easy.
All these changes can cause a wide array of emotions, from grief, stress, depression, anxiety, loneliness, and several other emotions.
These feelings are not uncommon during this difficult time. To help you navigate these emotional challenges, head over to our Health Coping page for services and advice.